Melt 2 tablespoons butter in a skillet over medium heat; add crackers, and saute until browned. Remove from skillet, and set aside.
Bring cabbage and 1/2 cup water to a boil in a large saucepan. Cover and cook 5 to 7 minutes or until tender; drain. Stir in salt and pepper; keep warm.
Melt 1/4 cup butter in skillet over low heat; whisk in flour until smooth. Cook, whisking constantly, 1 minute. Gradually add milk; cook over medium heat, whisking constantly, until thickened and bubbly. Stir sauce and crackers into cabbage.