Finally: Salad Cream-flavored ice cream
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With sweltering summer heat now pretty much a daily reality, we’ve definitely reached peak ice cream season. Despite the weirdness of 2020, there are just as many flavors and ways to enjoy ice cream as ever— maybe even more thanks to a recent proliferation of DIY sundae kits.

Maybe that’s why Heinz (yes, them) thought they could somehow get away with offering what will surely go down as the strangest and most unnecessary ice cream kit of this or any other year.

That’s my best guess, at least, because there seems to be no other logical explanation for these Heinz Creamz kits. Each gives you the tools you need to somehow create your own ice cream themed around one of Heinz’s savory sauces, for some reason. Available in five different “flavors” including Ketchup, Mayo, BBQ, “Saucy Sauce” and “Salad Creamz,” each kit (packaged in a branded gift box) includes a bottle of the aforementioned sauce, a golden scoop and spoon, a reusable ice cream tub, and the recipe info you need to make what may go down as the worst ice cream of all time.

heinz-creamz
Credit: Heinz

Heinz

Because America somehow doesn’t have a complete monopoly on bad ideas this year, these Heinz Creamz kits are only available in the UK. If you have a spare £15 to waste on torturing a loved one, go for it. If you’re in America and just want to punish yourself by making and consuming this ice cream for TikTok clout, you can view each recipe from its specific product page.

Look, the idea of what can constitute an ice cream flavor is broader than ever, what with the proliferation of oat milk-based vegan options and other alternatives. But the line must be drawn somewhere. Together, we can put a stop to savory ice creams that serve as little more than glorified PR stunts or leftover April Fools jokes. Just say no to Heinz Creams.