Finally, boozy brunch without the effort or forced socializing.

By Tim Nelson
February 14, 2020
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Without the Bloody Mary, brunch as we know it would cease to exist. Sure, the mighty mimosa commands a lot of attention, but it has nothing on that savory, spicy beverage when it comes to reviving both body and soul after a long night.

While there’s no substitute for a fresh Bloody Mary adorned with a variety of garnishes, the desperate among us might want to know that Frank’s RedHot sells cans of Bloody Mary that can help you fight your hangover hair of the dog-style from the comforts of home. According to the can, it’s a 5.5 percent ABV  “flavored malt beverage,” which means the “alcohol already in it” technically isn’t vodka. It’s also got a “medium heat” spice profile, perfect for enjoying a bit of kick without needing to chase with another beverage.

“It all started one day grilling in the back yard when a good friend served up Bloody Mary’s [sic] made with Frank’s RedHot Original Cayenne Pepper Sauce,” some copy on a website dedicated to the beverage reads. “The combination of flavor and heat was love at first taste! As beverage people we knew this had to be bottled and shared.”

While you can surely just drink this stuff straight from the can like some kind of degenerate, the website advises you shake the can to mix up its contents before then pouring it over ice into a pint glass. Garnish with lemon, lime, vegetables, and/or meats as you see fit. That may sound like a lot of unnecessary work, but nobody’s going to like your Instagram post of a canned Bloody Mary unless you put in some work.

If you’re ready to host your own at-home brunch while putting in as little effort as possible, it looks like you can buy a four-pack of 12-ounce bottles from Walmart. That should probably be enough to get the party started, especially if you don’t feel like inviting any friends over. I’d bet it pairs pretty well with the ultra-rare Frank’s RedHot x Dunkin’ spicy doughnut, but good luck finding that.