Get your syrup ready, aim, fire
EC: The Pancake Bullseye Is the Only Thing You Need to See on the Internet Today
Credit: Video by Alex Tepper / Styling by Jiselle Basile

What is the internet? Why is the internet here? Is there a meaning to the internet?

In this age of tired memes, endless trolling, and cat videos, these are the existential questions we must ask ourselves. So I propose this answer to you: The internet is here to unite the people of Earth by displaying the most revelatory ideas ever thought up by human beings.

World, meet The Pancake Bullseye.

The Pancake Bullseye is a functional archery target made entirely of pancake. Here, a bow and arrow is replaced by water gun and maple syrup. How can you make this entirely unnecessary, yet somehow essential breakfast creation? We’ll tell you.

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Credit: photo by alex tepper

To create The Pancake Bullseye, heat a nonstick pan and place red-dyed pancake batter in a cookie cutter until the bottom hardens. Next, surround the bullseye’s circumference with classic, beige pancake batter. Then fill the outer circle with the rest of the red-dyed batter to create a pattern that may or may not resemble a certain corporate logo. Make sure you overcook the bottom long enough so it’s nice and crusty, as this side will be glued to the backboard.

After you cut out a round section of poster board with a radius slightly larger than your pancake, squeeze a liberal amount of extra-strong multi-purpose waterproof glue and push down your bullseye to create a tight adhesion. Once dry, hang it on a wall. Then fill your water gun of choice with sweet, sweet maple syrup. Proceed to take out all your deep-seated aggression on The Pancake Bullseye. Yelling is encouraged.

Do NOT eat The Pancake Bullseye.