Photo courtesy of Target

A bold, new direction for milk

Mike Pomranz
November 02, 2018

When’s the last time you grabbed a cold glass of milk? For many people, it’s probably been quite some time. As NPR reported last year, American milk consumption has dropped significantly over the past four decades, from around 30 gallons per person per year in the 1970s to around 18 gallons now. Milk could certainly use a makeover, and this holiday season, Target has just such a plan: The retailer has released its own Sugar Cookie Milk.

For just $2.49 per quart, you can indulge in this “naturally flavored” sugar bomb. Made from whole milk, the label states that each one-cup serving contains 200 calories, 4.5 grams of saturated fat (which is a mere 23 percent of your recommended daily allowance), and 26 grams of sugar. But let’s be honest, if you’re drinking Sugar Cookie Milk, the amount of sugar you’re consuming is hopefully the least of your concerns—otherwise it’s probably time to rethink your whole diet.

A natural question that arises, of course, is how exactly are you supposed to drink Sugar Cookie Milk? Do you just drink it straight like chocolate milk? Would it work better mixed into your morning cup of coffee? Or maybe you could just aggressively pour it on your cereal? The package shows a glass of the stuff paired with sugar cookies, which seems like some serious overkill. Or obviously, you could always pour liquor into your Sugar Cookie Milk. That kind of applies with anything really.

But even if you’re a bit perplexed by what to do with Sugar Cookie Milk, this still seems like the kind of bold move milk needs. Part of milk’s image problems have stemmed from the fact that all sorts of things besides cows are getting into the milk game: soy milk, almond milk, rice milk, coconut milk. Lots of times, these milks bill themselves as better-for-you alternatives to lactose-packed regular milk. “Well, you know what?” says Sugar Cookie Milk. “To hell with that. We’re turning cow’s milk into a drinkable sugar cookie. Have fun milking a pile of soybeans!” Speaking of good times, Sugar Cookie Milk is only one type of Target’s flavored milks: Other options include Chocolate Mint Milk, Maple Pecan Milk, and Cinnamon Vanilla Milk. Way to go milk! It’s about time you spiced thing up. 

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