Scotch Eggs for Normal People

While I’ll never turn down the opportunity to order a Scotch egg, it disappoints me so when a gastropub serves me a comically large softball of sausage, split directly in half to reveal the hard boiled egg inside. These two gaping Scotch egg halves are usually arranged side by side on a threadbare carpet of wilted mixed greens, finished off with a drizzle of some mystery substance mixed with jarred mayo and re-christened to sound fancy. I will still eat and thoroughly enjoy it because eggs plus sausage plus deep frying could never possibly be wrong. But still, I pine for a Scotch egg that’s constructed within the bounds of sanity. That means one with a near equal sausage-to-egg ratio that’s large enough to satiate, yet small enough to store in your pocket for an impromptu snack.

Scotch eggs keep well in the fridge for a quite a few days, so it's best to make a dozen or so if you’re putting in the effort. Who’s going to do all this work for one egg? That’s ridiculous. Twelve eggs in a carton, two pockets in your pants. That’s nearly an entire week of meals in one go. [Editor's note: Extra Crispy does not endorse this as a nutritional or safe food handling strategy. Maybe pair it with a multivitamin and buy some Tupperware.]

12 eggs
1 ½ pounds loose sausage meat of your choice
1 cup flour
3 additional eggs
2 cups panko breadcrumbs or crushed saltines
Vegetable oil, for frying

4 quart saucepan
Big bowl of ice water
Spider strainer
Fry thermometer
Small bowls
Plastic wrap
Deep pot for frying
Paper-towel-lined platter

Following the same instructions listed in this boiled egg tutorial, soft-boil 12 eggs for 6 minutes before shocking them in ice water. Allow to sit in the water for 5 minutes before peeling.

Put a piece of plastic wrap out on the counter, and pat out a bit of sausage meat to make a rectangle-ish strip of meat about 8” by 4”. It can be as thick as you'd like, but I think ½” is ideal.

Stand the egg up in the middle of the sausage strip. Lift up the plastic to easily wrap the sausage around the egg, gently pressing to evenly pack it on. Remove any sausage meat that you find to be excessive. It’s not an exact science, but you’ll get the hang of it quickly.

Roll the sausage-coated egg in a bit of flour that’s been seasoned with salt and pepper. Whisk the 3 additional eggs with 2 tablespoons of water. Dip the Scotch eggs into the egg wash, then roll in panko crumbs. Refrigerate for at least 30 minutes or longer—at this point, the eggs can be held raw for up to 2 days.

When you're ready to cook, heat the vegetable oil to 350°F. Using a spider strainer, carefully drop in the eggs and fry until deep golden brown and crisp, about 5 minutes. Remove to a paper towel to drain. Serve warm or at room temperature.