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Apparently it “over-delivers on its alcohol content”

Tim Nelson
May 15, 2018

Ask any millennial who had their first drink before 2011, and they’ll likely have a Four Loko story to tell. In its brief but wondrous life as a caffeinated alcoholic beverage, Four Loko earned a reputation for inspiring the greatest parties and the worst decisions in equal measure.

Ever since the FDA banned OG Four Loko and other forms of caffeinated alcohol in late 2010, degenerates have sought a beverage that packages the experience of heart palpitations and the spins into a single product. We may never go all the way back to those hazy glory days, but some brave (or unfortunate) souls may have unwittingly discovered the next best thing.

The secret to eternal litness these days seems to be a little something called Capriccio Bubbly Sangria, a drink that’s recently surfaced on social media. There’s only scant information about the product online, but parent company Florida Caribbean Distillers touts it as the “#1 selling sangria in the Caribbean.” In a since-removed YouTube video first found by Buzzfeed, the distillery’s national sales director Dave Steiner touts the 13.9% abv beverage as a “100% natural product” that’s “equivalent to two glasses of wine,” yet “over-delivers on its alcohol content.”

If a number of posts that have surfaced over the last week are any indication, Steiner’s last statement has proven prophetic. It only takes a quick search on Twitter to find photos of the festively fruity bottle captioned with serious warnings that these things will get you wrecked faster than you can say “made with premium grape wine, with natural flavors and artificial color.”

Multiple posts suggest that it doesn’t even take a whole bottle before one starts to feel significantly impaired. One snapchat user took two to the face and had a pretty hazy ending to their night, while someone else was caught off guard after trying one before/during a Mother’s Day gathering.

So what exactly is going on? Clearly something suspect if the equivalent of one to two glasses of wine is enough to leave some who’ve encountered Carpiccio’s questionable beverage feeling more than a little worse for wear. Is it a labelling problem? Some malicious foreign ingredient? Who knows, but the fact that one of the other drinks prominently featured on Florida Caribbean Distillers’ website is an obvious Mad Dog 20/20 knockoff, it sure doesn’t feel like drinking responsibly is at the top of their corporate agenda.

So, yeah. Do with that information what you will. Just don’t blame us when your classy sangria party gets a little too weird. And if we know anything about how youth culture works in the modern internet era, we’re about a day or two away from the #CarpiccioChallenge anyway. Tread carefully.

 

 

  

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