It's the morning after a big party, and you're surveying the landscape of your tattered apartment. Maybe there are some Solo cups half-filled with cheap beer scattered about, perhaps a bowl with the crumbs of tortilla chips dusting the bottom, maybe some half-eaten wings strewn about. Or maybe you're one of those people who cleans up the night of a party instead of the morning after, but you still half a lot of half-empty bags of snacks in your pantry and no real idea what to do with those rapidly-staling Cooler Ranch Doritos. Don't throw away that chip shake! Turn it into a suspiciously delicious casserole.
The Pizza Roll Leftover Dirtbag Casserole uses, as you might suspect, pizza rolls as the base, but you could also use Bagel Bites, slices of takeout or frozen pizza cut into strips, or any other pizza-like substance in your home. The premise is simple: Make a kind of lasagna creations using the pizza rolls (or mini-bagels or biscuit dough) as the noodles, and salsa as the tomato sauce. Top it all off with a healthy shake from the bottom of the bag of Doritos, Cheetos, or your leftover party sized bag of choice. Seal it with some eggs and milk whipped together, throw it in the oven for a while, and voila: you've transformed your party leftovers into a pizza casserole good enough for breakfast, and leftover lunch too. Reduce, reuse, recycle, y'know?
Pizza Roll Lasagna Dirtbag Casserole
Photo by teresa Sabga
Mozzarella (or whatever cheese you have on hand, seriously)
¼ cup milk
Chips of all sorts, crushed
How to Make It
Grease a casserole pan or baking dish with whatever seems reasonable. Layer it with thawed pizza rolls or other carb substance. Top that with a generous layer of cheese and another of salsa. Repeat all 3 layers.
In a separate container, beat together egg and milk. If finding a clean fork to do that with seems too daunting, put them in a lidded jar and shake until well-combined. Pour that over the whole mighty mess, and add one final layer of crushed-up chips. Cover in foil. (We learned the hard way that even lightly-burned Cheetos are remarkably foul.) At this point, if you can bear it, chill your creation for a few hours, or overnight. If not, that's entirely understandable. If you're making this, you're drunk or hungover and that's not a critique, it is just an observation. Seriously, do you think we were 100 percent sober when we were making this?
Pre-heat oven to 375°F. Bake casserole covered for 20-40 minutes, until the egg is set and the pizza rolls are cooked through. Serve with Jungle Juice and zero shame.