Despite his special gifts, Rabiot the octopus was still eaten
Before the start of the World Cup last month, a giant Pacific octopus was caught off the Japanese port of Obira and given the name Rabiot. According to the Telegraph, he quickly began a new career picking soccer matches. Kimio Abe, the fisherman who captured him, placed three baskets of food in Rabiot’s tank: one for win, one for draw, and one for loss. Rabiot was first tasked with determining who would win Japan’s opening game against Colombia, and he correctly choose Japan’s surprising upset win. His winning streak continued from there, accurately picking Japan to draw against Senegal and lose to Poland.
Needless to say, Rabiot’s run of good luck garnered him headlines across Japan with the media lining up to hear his next pick. And yet, despite going three-for-three, the octopus’s luck ran out before he even had a chance to predict Japan’s first match in the knockout stage yesterday. Abe decided that business was more important than celebrity, and the fisherman chose to gut and sell Rabiot to be eaten.
But perhaps even more pathetically, Abe reportedly tried to keep his string of successful picks going by bringing in a new octopus… also named Rabiot. Talk about a scam! Though it’s not known if Rabiot II correctly picked the winner of Japan’s fourth match, what is known is that Japan suffered one of the most painful losses in its World Cup history: giving up a two-to-nil lead over Belgium late in the second half, culminating in Belgium pulling of a last-minute victory deep into extra time.
Of course, you could surmise that Japan’s loss was due to Rabiot seeking revenge from beyond the grave. A far more sensible exxplanation is that Rabiot’s extraterrestrial ancestors chose to show their displeasure by controlling the game with their mind powers sent from a far off sector of the cosmos. You don’t need to be smart as an octopus to figure that out.