Sausage > acai
EC: Instagram Breakfast Bowl for a Garbage Person
Credit: Photo and Video by Alex Tepper

Quinoa. Chia. Oatmeal. Breakfast bowls are certainly a thing. Açaí bowls—deemed the world’s healthiest breakfast by some—seem to be all the rage right now, along with the smoothie bowl art that floods your Instagram feed. They’re beautiful, sure. There’s no denying that. But sometimes you don't want to be healthy and you'd much rather eat meat and carbs, then take a long nap. You know, like a garbage person. So instead of building a bowl with fruit, we turned to our favorite salty and savory breakfast foods. Cheesy, creamy polenta is the perfect base for a meaty "smoothie" bowl. Unlike a real smoothie bowl, the toppings in this dish sit perfectly on top of the porridge without sinking. Spicy Italian sausage crumbled overtop mimics the look of granola. Sliced avocado, hot sauce, salt, and crushed red pepper all make it look cute. Just make sure to snap a photo before swirling it all together. Promise: This savory breakfast bowl will set your Instagram likes to an all-time high.