Haunted Bananas Are the New Way to Spook People in the Produce Section
Terrify unsuspecting strangers who want to eat fruit!
In the old days, if you wanted to make a joke using banana, you’d have to either play up their phallic shape or leave a peel for an unsuspecting person to slip on. But because social media has fundamentally reshaped both comedy and how we annoy random strangers, today offers new possibility for the banana. And if one viral tweet inspires widespread action, bananas across the country are about to get a whole lot creepier.
The inspiration comes from TV writer Kevin Biegel, whose work you’re familiar with if you can remember 2000’s hospital comedy Scrubs or are one of the twelve people who watched Enlisted before it was cancelled. Well, Kevin came up with the nefarious plot to scratch secret messages into banana peels. Almost invisible to the naked eye before the offending fruit is plucked out of the produce section, the ghastly messages eventually reveal themselves hours (or even days) later as ripening takes place. Biegel opted to carve “I KNOW WHAT YOU DID” into the banana he carved (and brought home to show off himself), just vague and unsettling enough to creep out an unsuspecting person who thought they were just reaching for a potassium-packed snack but will instead have to confront the secret guilt that’s gnawed at them for years.
Though Tweet’s garnered significant social media engagement, this sort of banana trolling doesn’t seem to have taken off yet. Searches for “haunted banana” and “#hauntedbanana” doesn’t return much on social media beyond Biegel’s initial breakthrough. Could it just be that the end recipients of these haunted bananas are too traumatized to document the horror that has been visited upon them? Are we overestimating the persuasive powers of a single tweet by a TV writer who worked on Cougar Town? It’s possible that both of those things are true at the same time.
Anyways, maybe the better thing to do is to carve up your own bananas so that you can document the reactions of friends or roommates. Maybe they’ll freak out, have a heart attack, and die. Maybe they’ll think you’re weird for writing on a banana because someone on the internet told you to. Maybe they’ll even have no reaction at all! At least this manipulation of the banana ripening process is less stale than leaving a peel out and hoping someone falls on their back.