Because of course it is
EC: Alcoholic Smirnoff Coffee Soda Is Now a Thing in Japan
Credit: Photo Courtesy of Smirnoff

While the world was losing its collective mind earlier this summer, Japan was blessed with an alcoholic Smirnoff coffee soda known as Smirnoff Mountain Pick Coffee. The beverage is a carbonated alcoholic coffee that’s, presumably, for people who love the perk of a vodka-and-Red Bull cocktail but hate the taste. Or perhaps for the discrete business professional who needs to take the edge off before filing the day’s TPS reports. It’s not our role to judge—just to report.

The new Smirnoff coffee drink is part of the company’s new Smirnoff World Fusion alcoholic soda line (or alcopop, if you will). The beverage is made with real coffee and clocks in at 5 percent alcohol by volume, about the same amount of booze you’d find in a can of Sapporo. According to the Smirnoff Japan homepage and Google Translate (my intro to Japanese classes aren’t helping here), Smirnoff Mountain Pick is an “effervescent” beverage made for enjoyment on a “rainy day.” Not sure if this is what I’d pick to get boozed up during a rainstorm. But then again, with this kind of ad campaign, maybe I’d reconsider.

A few intrepid souls on the internet have tried the Smirnoff coffee beverage, and their reviews are mixed. One blogger said (again, according to Google Translate) that Smirnoff Mountain Pick Coffee has the “solid taste of coffee,” and that “it almost felt like [a] coffee float.” But ultimately, the drink was not the kind of thing they’d “want to drink every night.”

Over on Reddit, one user who tried it said, “Well, it's carbonated. So imagine what coffee soda would taste like. It was a little too sweet.” Another joked that the Smirnoff coffee concoction is “Perfect for the working alcoholic! What an ingenious market niche!” There’s no word yet on whether or not it’s coming to the United States. And to be honest, I highly doubt we’re ready for this next-level beverage anyway.