Haters, back off.
Hi. My name is Corey. I’m 23 years old and I’m a Lunchable-aholic. When I’m not binging on assembly-required pizza rounds, you’re likely to find me in the frozen foods aisle, filling my cart with Kid Cuisine and Chef Boyardee products.
It’s not like I’m a picky eater—in fact, you’d be hard-pressed to find something I won’t eat. Black olives (barf) aside, I’m pretty much a garbage disposal when it comes to food. You want a fancy dinner at a 5-star restaurant? I’m there. Feeling like a Cheetos Sandwich from KFC to wash it down? Gimme.
WATCH: KFC's New Cheetos-Filled Sandwich Is a Glorious Nightmare
I ain’t no slouch in the kitchen, either. You’re not going to see me on Chopped anytime soon, but I can put together a nice meal when I want to.
You’ll notice, I emphasized “when I want to.” Because sometimes I don’t. In fact, a lot of times I opt for Taco Bell or Popeyes. Other times, I’m in the mood for a good ol’ Lean Cuisine. And you know what? Sometimes I just want a damn Lunchable and Kid Cuisine.
I like pizza, I like chicken nuggets, and I like macaroni and cheese. So do children. Kids have good taste, what can I say?
Like, say you go to a nice restaurant and order a steak. That steak could be overcooked, undercooked, or just plain blah. Now imagine ordering chicken fingers from that same restaurant. They’re always going to be amazing. There are just foods that are never bad, and kids (and some adults) know that to be true.
So don't shame adults who have childlike tastes and like a quick meal. You’re not any better with your Blue Apron subscription—you’re just $60 (per month!) poorer, give or take.
For all you like-minded eaters out there: Stock up on tasty $1 meals, forget the haters, and let your unrefined palate fly.