Did you say … chocolate?  

By Corey Williams
January 30, 2019

Do you love chocolate? Sure you do. But do you love it as much as this guy?

If you’re over 30 (or if you’re under 30, but spent your youth doing anything besides watching Nickelodeon), you might be a little lost. Let me explain:

Many miles under the sea, there exists a town called Bikini Bottom. In that town lives a pair of best friends: Spongebob Squarepants, a sponge, and Patrick Star, a starfish.

One fateful day in 2002, Spongebob and Patrick decided to become entrepreneurs. How did they plan to achieve their lofty business goals? By selling chocolate door-to-door, of course.

Their first customer was this gentleman:

When he heard what they were selling, he began maniacally screaming “CHOCCCOLATE.” The friends were so startled, they ran away.

Then they met this lovely mother-daughter duo:

The older lady, who wasn’t a chocolate fan, purchased a bar after the newfound salesmen convinced her it would would extend her lifespan.

But their luck was short-lived: The crazy chocolate man had caught up to them.

In a happy twist of fate, though, it turned out that the man was not dangerous—he was just crazy for chocolate.

He purchased their entire inventory. In the end, Spongebob and Patrick used the funds to take the mother-daughter pair to a nice restaurant.

Why did I just spend all that time recounting, in painstaking detail, the plot of a 17-year-old cartoon episode?

Because I make poor decisions. Also, because it was the only way to get my point across.

Listen: You are going to love these chocolate dessert recipes. You’re going to love them like that fish guy would love them.