In a saucepan, cover the barley with 2 cups of water, add a pinch of salt and bring to a boil. Cover and simmer over low heat until the barley is just tender, about 25 minutes.
Cut the tofu into 1-inch cubes. In a large nonstick skillet, heat 1 tablespoon of the grapeseed oil with the sesame oil until shimmering. Add the tofu and five-spice powder and cook over moderately high heat, stirring, until lightly browned, 7 minutes. Add the scallions and cook for 1 minute. Season with salt and pepper and transfer the tofu to a plate.
Add the remaining 1 tablespoon of grapeseed oil to the skillet. Add the lemongrass and cook over moderately high heat for 1 minute. Add the kale and cook, stirring, until wilted, about 2 minutes. Add the barley and cook for 1 minute. Add the horseradish, tamari and vinegar and cook, stirring, until the pan is nearly dry, about 2 minutes.
Transfer the barley and kale to a platter. Top with the tofu, toasted coconut, sesame seeds and cilantro. Serve right away.