Courtesy of Firebox

Filing these under “things we didn’t know we needed before we knew they existed.”

Darcy Lenz
April 24, 2018

After the Internet went crazy for this “spreadable gin,” A.K.A. gin and tonic marmalade, from spunky, London-based online retailer Firebox, we have been exploring—and pining for—other spreadable/edible/sippable products the company has to offer. Alas, most everything we want cannot yet be shipped to the United States. Thus, I won’t be able to spread one of my all-time favorite cocktails (in gelatinous jelly form) over a warm biscuit anytime in the foreseeable future—which is a very real bummer. Should shipping availability ever extend across the pond to the U.S., here are the top 6 items on the MyRecipes staff’s wish list:

Spreadable Beer 

If you say that you don’t want a grilled cheese sandwich with a generous slathering of beer jam on it, I’m gonna say that you’re lying. 

Unicorn Tears Raspberry Gin Liqueur

There are times in life—like Mondays—when all you want is a moment alone with a good (i.e potent) cocktail. Now, just imagine how much better that moment would be if your cocktail was pink and shimmery… I know this may not appeal to everyone, but I think there’s something rather magical about the idea of sipping on what Hello Kitty probably throws back to unwind. 

Unicorn Tears Black Gin Liqueur 

The first two bullet points of product description are enough.  

  • Magical BLACK unicorn tears gin, cried by gothic magical steeds
  • The unicorns are called things like Raven and Midnight

Boozy Chocolate Brussels Sprouts

Courtesy of Firebox

It’s hard to resist something this quirky and bizarre. Plus, these spiked, Brussels sprout-inspired chocolates reiterate how much these people love gin—I respect people who love gin. Also, they’re on sale. Last thing, this savage line from the product description, “Less pretentious and more delicious than a tray of Ferrero Rocher.” I’m sold. 

Spreadable Coffee

FINALLY caffeine you can spread on toast 🙌🙌🙌 link in bio

A post shared by firebox.com (@wearefirebox) on

If it’s another way of getting caffeine pumping through my veins in the morning—I’m about it. 

Peanut Butter and Jam Old Fashioned

Not only is it a pre-mixed cocktail (which saves me approximately 60 seconds of “work”), but it’s a premixed cocktail flavored to taste like the iconic food you hand kids who refuse to eat anything else. It’s basically a boozy twist on the comforting childhood sensation that comes along with having someone else take care of you… bottled up for adults. It’s genius.

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