Photo: Jennifer Causey; Styling: Claire Spollen

Breakfast in bed looks all romantic and serene. Just you, a pile of new magazines, the remote, a crusty pastry, and a cup of coffee. It's all carbs and caffeine until somebody spills the coffee. Find out what foods you should never serve in bed.

January 31, 2017

Breakfast in bed is like napping in a hammock. It's amazing in theory until you wake up with odd shapes mashed into your thighs and the dog licking you.

Confession: I never eat in my bed. The last time I did was when I had the flu and had to sneak a pack of peanut butter sandwich cookies into my bedroom to avoid turning the entire house into an infirmary. Give me clean, crumb-free sheets any day over a carb-infused profession of love. Maybe if I had more supportive pillows or a regular housekeeper, but until then, give me breakfast at the table any day.

Eating in bed translates to lots of people sharing my breakfast in my sheets. It's the poker's cove of pastry land. No thank you.

The crew at MyRecipes, however, loves food in bed. Not breakfast in bed, because that would be limiting. No, they hardcore love eating food in bed all day long. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, snacks, and dessert—they'd prefer to eat semi-upright off a tray while sporting yoga pants and yesterday's t-shirt. But, as it turns out, there are limits to what can be enjoyed in bed. Even for them.

The 4 Worst Foods to Serve in Bed

 Photo: Jennifer Davick; Styling: Lydia Degaris Pursell

Just the name of this cake gives me anxiety: Crumb cake. If I eat it with my fingers, I've doubled the problem. Now I've got a sheets-as-napkin situation plus tiny bits of cake that I'm sure to find with my feet later. Ew. Gross. No.

 Photo: Jennifer Causey; Styling: Claire Spollen

If you must eat in bed, keep it simple. A nice quiche can be sliced easily with a fork. A waffle, on the other hand, requires the use of both hands to wield a fork and a knife. Not only does this make me put down the remote, it requires that I actually look down at the plate. Hard pass, waffle. See you at the table, blueberry drizzle.

 Oxmoor House

And speaking of stains I'll never get out of my sheets, syrup. Why I even allow syrup in my house is beyond me. I get sticky just looking at it. My breakfast table, the rightful home of our traditional Saturday pancake feast, takes hours to recover after the pouring (and dipping and dunking and licking) of the syrup. Syrup is also somehow the "gift" that keeps on giving. I can spill it on my leg and transfer it with ease to my hands, cabinets, chair, and doorframe all while maintaining full stickiness on my leg. 

 Photo: Iain Bagwell

Oh, the breakfast burrito. When I eat burritos, I strategically place my pile of chips under the burrito to catch all the goodness that falls out the back end due to unavoidable tortilla failure. This is a brilliant way to make lazy nachos, but also the exact reason why burritos do not belong in the bedroom.

Related: See how to make Quiche in a Sweet Potato Crust

 

What should you eat in bed? Things that are easily handled. Avocado toast. Oatmeal in a sturdy bowl. Quiche. There are plenty of ways to enjoy breakfast in bed that won't require you change your sheets and pjs shortly after. Check out our favorite Breakfast in Bed Recipes. Choose wisely, and enjoy.

You May Like